is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize