So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
