found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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