Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
