Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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