Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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