yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Randomize
