how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
tell me about the eggs
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
