Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
