i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
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