we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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