Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
