i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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