i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
