matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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