i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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