I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
