3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
A bitchslap is in order.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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