Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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