you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
