Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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