If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
