We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Damn victory sex feels great
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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