Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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