quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
