I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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