It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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