i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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