I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize