the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
