I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize