Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I fill condoms, not promises.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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