C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize