By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
