Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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