Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
