rhymes with "ouble enetration"
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
