WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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