I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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