Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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