Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
