i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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