Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize