the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
