Where is the hickey?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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