By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
His nipple licking is glorious
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