friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Randomize