oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
