Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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