I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
