Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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